Ewan gets Shmangled

No that isn’t a real word. But it is now because I used it. I went to a party on Wednesday and stopped partying on Thursday. Now, we all know how I am. A social casualty, a recluse, someone who doesn’t go out too much. So I went to my friends party. Let’s find out what happened.

I should just say also, I don’t drink. I rarely ever do so this was pretty much my first time drinking more than one alcoholic beverage. And it was the first party I’ve ever been to. So I mean, I was 98% sure my liver would fail and I wouldn’t survive, but, unfortunately, due to this post being released, it must mean I have in fact survived. This is very unfortunate news for all of my reader, as I know you’ve been waiting for me to keel over and die for a very long time. Don’t worry, nearly there.

Now leading up to the party I had no intention of really doing anything of credibility. However I am the Karaoke King and I had to perform. So me and Erin, my “Karaoke Krew” did one or two songs, we did The Coral, Hoosiers, Madness, Queen, the usual suspects, it was phenomenal.

Of course considering there were that many people there, we had to sleep in tents. This sounds fine, right? Wrong. I’m extremely claustrophobic, so I was gonna sleep in the summer house, all well and good, right? I mean, they had a sofa bed and so on. Unfortunately 12 drunk people also gathered in said summer house and flung drink, food and other stuff about. So I slept in something that would’ve probably given me alcohol poisoning and killed me if I hadn’t kept the window open.

Being almost six foot, I had trouble sleeping on a three foot couch. I couldn’t pull the couch out because there were too many bottles and such on the floor. I must have woken up about six or so times throughout the night, the final time I woke up I looked out of the see through door to see five people taking photos of me because I looked like I’d drank five litres of whiskey.

And to be honest, sleeping in an alcohol filled, glowstick enhanced room was the best night of my life. It really was. I made a new friend, not going into details but said friend is a lovely person. And as for the birthday person, we had one hell of a party for them. Nobody ate anything, some stupid fuck spilt their drink all over the sandwiches.

But all in all I had an amazing time, from making a new friend to almost falling into a pond to watching my dumb friends cut open a glowstick in their hand with a knife, all in all, a great day.

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