Ewan Rants: Halo and 343 Industries

This is something that made me almost as mad as Five Nights at Freddy’s and Payday 2 did. My God there’s so much to talk about yet I’m not sure where to start. I’ll just crack on I suppose. This might be a long one considering how much shit they’ve pulled in the past few years.

343 Industries/Studios/Incorporated/Evil Inc. is going to destroy the Halo franchise and so far they’re succeeding pretty damn well at that. They started the downward spiral with Halo Combat Evolved Anniversary, a re-make of an extremely good game. On release, it was a laggy mess of a game and extremely broken and it still to this day is unplayable in co-op. They continued their triumphant streak by releasing the “game” Halo 4. That game was a big red warning light that said in big capital letters: WATCH OUT, WE’RE GONNA RUIN ALL THIS SHIT, and so they did, they ruined the hell out of everything. Not only did they ruin the lore, they removed the flood/forerunners, the covenant were basically kicked out of the way for the new enemies, which are known as the “Prometheans”.

I know it’s a small thing but they changed Master Chiefs armour and I’m not quite sure why it bothered me so much but it did, he looks like he’s stapled toasters to himself. This is just one of the many, many things wrong with the Master Chief Collection and the newer Halo games (Anything after Reach) in general.

Now, it can’t get much worse, can it?

It can.

With the release of The Master Chief Collection, on launch it was horrifying, everything was bugged, broken and in a poor state, especially the multiplayer. I remember before I got rid of my old phone I had a picture saved onto it and it was a petition of sorts to not buy Halo 5 until they fixed Halo: The Master Chief Collection. I can’t actually find the image of that because it seems to have disappeared off of the face of the earth but trust me, it happened.

If I’m honest with you all, I have yet to play Halo 5: Guardians or whatever the hell it’s called. I’ll be playing it through around Christmas time and then I’ll be writing a review of it, along with Fallout 4 and a couple other games.

You may think I’m being very negative about a game I’ve never played, well, that’s what you have to do nowadays. Be negative going into the game, see if the game amazes you in some way, if not then you were right, if you’re impressed you’re pleasantly surprised. It’s the perfect combo, especially for 343’s games which I can only assume is what happens when you drink paint thinner and give a four year old the assets to your games and stick him on Unity.

Now I’m not saying there weren’t any good parts to Halo 4 and Combat Evolved Anniversary, there was, uhm… I’m sure there was something I liked about the game. I mean, the snapping between old and new graphics on Combat Evolved was good (even though it took half an hour and you can’t change the graphic style in cutscenes).

I noticed that the only thing 343 seem to be getting right so far is the porting of Halo 3, I love that game and the port for it to the Xbox One was alright. Looked nice and all that, but the defining moment of your career shouldn’t be slapping Halo 3 onto an Xbox One. I can do that, I’ll get my disc for Halo 3 and slap it on every Xbox One in the United Kingdom if that’s what it takes.

I might possibly be giving 343 too much hate, but I’m giving them so much hate as they’ve yet to prove they can make a decent Halo game. Bungie realised pretty quickly that “space shooter” was getting old after five or six games and they wanted to narrow that down to one so they went on to make Destiny.

I played the Halo 5 beta for a few hours and in my opinion, the game was horrible. The beta left an insanely bad taste in my mouth because all it was really just Call of Duty in space. However when I did actually get around to playing Halo 5: Guardians, I was impressed. The story was about as flimsy as Jimmy Carr’s tax repayments (wasn’t that a topical joke) and the characters were about as bland as the new cast of the Ghostbusters film. Other than that I did enjoy it and sank quite a few hours into the game as I played it with friends. Expect a review on this in the coming months.

But 343 seem to be picking up where Bungie left off. As much as I’d love to forget about Halo 4, Master Chief Collection and Halo Combat Evolved Anniversary, I could probably forgive them as they brought us the exceptional Halo 5: Guardians, the twin stick shooter Halo: Spartan Assault and they’ve given the go ahead on Halo Wars 2, which I’m insanely excited for.

You may have 343 Studios in your bad books, but that might change in the coming years if they sort themselves out.


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