Extended Thoughts on the Education System

Okay, so I know I did an article on why school is hell and I think I put up a couple of points about it, but there was so much more I wanted to say and due to time constraints I wasn’t able to, so consider this a more serious article. This is my genuine opinion, not much comedy in here whatsoever, more or less my blunt, unedited opinion. I’ve genuinely done some research for this, I just wanted to get a number of points across.

Now thanks to the ever-growing burden of society that is Facebook, I saw something my friend had shared. This can be seen below. Give it a read.

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5 Games I Hate that Everybody Else Loves

The very first post I wrote for Updownright.com was the “5 Games I Like that Everybody Else Hates” and I thought it fitting that I finish the series off by talking about the games that I hate that you all love. Please, don’t kill me. These are all my opinions. If you like these games (or series) then good on you, well done, nice one. If you hate these games like I do, well, you’re special in my eyes.

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Achievement Unlocked – Wolf Among Us

Platform: Xbox One
Time to Complete: 10 – 12 Hours
Gamerscore Available: 1000G
Gamerscore Achievable: 1000G

It’s all coming up things Telltale, not just because they’re fun games (most of the time), not just even because of the easy 1000G, no, it’s mainly because it’s Tuesday night and this is going to be released in about two hours time, let’s get on with it then shall we?

*There’s gonna be spoilers*

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Is It Worth Watching: Guest House Paradiso

For those of you who don’t know, Guest House Paradiso is a movie that is connected to the TV Show “Bottom”. Bottom is a slapstick, black humoured comedy show and is quite definitely one of the all time greatest comedy shows ever broadcast. The film adaptation for some reason isn’t entitled something relating to Bottom, so let’s delve into this film and see what it’s about and if it’s any good.

Those of you who want to watch the film at the same time as me writing this review, then here’s a link to the film. I do apologise to those who can’t use this link for whatever reason but I’ve used this link to watch the film multiple times and I’ve had no problems with it. Anyway, on with the review! I’m going to be testing a new way of reviewing the film, if it doesn’t work then I’ll probably end up posting it anyway.

It goes without saying that there will be a large amount of spoilers in the plot portion of this review so feel free to skip over that if you like.


The premise of the film is that the two beloved idiots from the TV Show (Richard Richard and Eddie Hitler) have moved away to some remote part of the UK to open up their very own hotel. Right next to a nuclear power plant. Richard (played by the late and great Rik Mayall) has taken on the role of Hotel Manager and Eddie (played by the still living Ade Edmondson) is pretty much co-manager. They make a joke about Eddie being the bell boy but his role in the hotel is basically identical to that of Richard’s in which they do basically everything. There’s also Chef, who’s only in the film for a brief cameo role if anything, he’s played by the guy that also played Spudgun on the TV Show, so I’m pretty certain that this character was made entirely for a cameo role.

Bill Nighy and Simon Pegg both make appearances in this film, with Pegg making a much larger appearance as it seems that the majority of the characters in the first half hour of the film disappear for no reason. That’s one of the problems I noticed early on. Some characters are literally only there for a gag or to advance the plot. Bill Nighy’s character is there literally to punch Richard in the face, the loved up newly weds are there so Richard can make a gag about sex and the love interest’s ex-fiance is there so the story has a villain.

Now there seems to be a big focus on a celebrity named Gina Carbonara. She’s also Italian. What a play on words, very creative. Basically she runs from her wedding and goes into hiding in the Guest House Paradiso because it’s presumably such a horrific hotel. Somehow the fiance tracks her down to this very remote location and everything goes horribly wrong. I don’t want to spoil the big twist, but it ends in traditionally comic Bottom fashion.

I know I haven’t given much away plot wise but it’s because it’s better to experience it for yourself, well, what there is of it.


It’s the Bottom movie, Bottom is known for slapstick, over the top comedy. Did this film deliver? Yes. Definitely. A lot of the humour is still slapstick which I absolutely adore but there’s also some visual gags and just general jokes in there as well. I’m pretty certain this is the only film I can see Rik Mayall have a pencil shot up his arse and proceed to have a violent fit of pain on a table in-front of guests.

It’s a comedy film, so all that really matters is if it’s funny or not. It’s extremely funny, I’d say about as good as that of the TV Show’s humour. The slapstick is given to us in large chunks and it’s original, nothing is really copied over from the TV Show, meaning they provide new gags for us to laugh at. One of which literally made me almost vomit out of fear and made me cringe, it’s the big where they pull Simon Pegg up to the roof by the ring on his chest. With a fishing rod. And then it rips off.

Come to think of it, the fact that they involve multiple people in the slapstick means it has a new breath of life, wherein it’s not just Rik and Ade, it’s Rik and Bill or Rik, Ade and Simon or just Ade and some children on a swing.

Whatever I say in this article doesn’t matter. Let’s just cut right to it. The film is worth watching. If you’re a fan of Rik Mayall, Ade Edmondson, Bottom or just comedy shows/films in general then this is a must see.

Ewan talks Politics…again…

This is the last one, I promise. Well, this promise is about as useful as Nick Clegg’s promises, but you know what I mean. I like writing politics, I feel I represent the general person because I do surprisingly understand a good chunk of what’s going on and I want to make it simplistic as possible so as many people can understand. Now I’m not calling you all thick shits, don’t take it like that you thick shits. Anyway, let’s get on with it, there’s a lot to cover and I want to get back to watching Bottom for the fifth time.

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The Impossible Game Review

Now then, I’m not saying I’m good at games, but I’m good at games. I’ve never really seen the point of having a deliberately difficult game such as Super Meat Boy or Super Hexagon because if we’re honest, out of all of us here, who’s going to see the ending of that game or 100% complete it? Maniacs. That’s who. The people you see in the street and they’ve got leather jackets on, that’s them. No, wait, they’re greasers or apart of a gang of some form.

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An Hour With: Call of Juarez: The Cartel

So continuing the trending theme of “playing shit I bought two years ago”, I pulled Call of Juarez: The Cartel off of my shelf and stuck it in my Xbox, it wasn’t the first time I had played the game however, I had in fact played it once, gotten one single achievement on it and never played it again, not even moving past the first level.

So, what’s it like then?

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